Triumphant Tuesday: Breastfeeding a Baby with Facial Malformation

Medical staff have a trigger happy tendency to push formula upon babies at the best of times. However, when confronted with a baby that doesn't fit the textbook norm, the drive to push formula is even more relentless. Rather than research or seeking specialist knowledge, medical staff who find themselves in this scenario often give half-hearted assistance and blind guesses before resorting to bottle-pushing, as this mother found out.

“I always knew I'd breastfeed, formula wasn’t even considered. I did plenty of research on latching, I felt so prepared! Even so, our problems began right at the start of our journey. 

Hostile Hospital Staff


When Evelynn was born I noticed she had a flattened nose, making it hard for her to breathe and suckle at the same time. Consequently she kept pulling off. I asked the hospital staff to watch me nurse and they said the latch was great and that my daughter needed to eat right away. They said I wasn’t giving her enough. I insisted I wanted to go home but they kept me in for two nights. They told me over and over that my baby needed more food but didn’t do anything productive to help me feed her.

After several more attempts I said I didn’t think she could breathe whilst she fed. They offered saline drops to clear her nose and told me to ring every time she wanted feeding. However as they were busy, every time Evie wanted feeding it meant I had to wait for them to arrive, then wait for them to go get the drops, then administer them, and in the meantime I had a screaming newborn! The drops didn’t even work though as her nose wasn’t ‘blocked’ - it was flat. 


I also suspect Evie had a light lip-tie. When she was latched on I felt strange sensations and spasms on my right side, possibly vasospasm. The staff also kept bringing me more pillows so I could have her higher on my lap, which just squished her face more into my breast. 

The next day they said they needed to see her feeding chart before they would let me go home. This was the first mention of a chart I heard! I hadn’t kept one. A nurse said that she would need to give formula if I didn’t feed her. So in the end I dripped the colostrum straight into her mouth.

To confuse matters further, when Evie was asleep I asked if I should feed her. The nurse replied, “She’s asleep! Yes feed her when she wants, but no don’t wake her!” She looked at me like I was nuts. 

The next night, a student nurse sat with me while Evie fed for an hour. She kept assuring me that although it didn’t seem like Evie was sucking or swallowing (I couldn’t see movement or feel/hear sucking) while she was latched “she must have had something”. It was that feed which allowed me to leave the next day after being asked if I was confident breastfeeding. I wasn’t but I said yes just so I could go home and see my local breastfeeding team.

Call in the Pros

When I arrived home the breastfeeding team came round and showed me how to do the underarm hold which I found much easier. It kept Evie's nose completely clear so she could feed and my milk came in. However Evie still wasn’t eating much and my breasts became painfully engorged.

I had to have the breastfeeding team round to my home a few times because Evie barely ate for 3 days. The health visitor was worried she'd loose too much weight and kept suggesting formula but the breastfeeding team encouraged me to keep at it.


One morning I phoned the team in tears. I was completely engorged after an awful night of being unable to latch Evie at all. They offered to come round right away asking me to hold on for an hour. I felt so relieved knowing I was getting help. This feeling is relief made me calm enough that just after the reassuring phone call I swaddled my screaming newborn and managed to latch her on! 

It still took some practise to get 'perfect' and after 2 years my toddler is a pro in all manner of positions!

My Opinion Of People Who Don’t Try Breastfeeding

People who don’t try breastfeeding fall into two groups.

The first group are truly ignorant to the fact that breastfeeding is so much better then formula as well as cheaper and easier then bottles. These people I feel sorry for; that advertising and lack of understanding has robbed their child of breastmilk.

The second group are the ones who know about breastfeeding benefits, have researched it or learned about it at parent classes or even know breastfeeders; yet for whatever reason (parental pressure, society, embarrassment, disgust, perceived inconvenience) don’t even try to line their babies tummy with that liquid gold. To them I try to be understanding but ultimately I think they’re selfish. ”




Get your own Bingo Card here.

Email me with your story.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

10 Shocking Things Facebook Finds Less Offensive Than Breastfeeding

Image
If you're a breastfeeding mother with the audacity to step foot aboard the Good Ship Facebook, prepare to walk the plank. For, as everyone knows, treasure 'chests' of the lactating variety are prohibited on these seas. And, because everyone knows this, there’s a good chance a buccaneer from your (so-called) matey list will betray you and hit report. Indeed, the motley crew at Facebook proudly boast that they’ve: “built industry leading technical and human systems” and: “developed sophisticated tools” to help their crew evaluate the reports they receive. “As a result, we believe we are able to remove the vast majority of content that violates our standards” ( Facebook 2013 ). Rightyo. I decided to test these ‘industry leading’ report systems. For the first time in my long and illustrious relationship with the t’internet I hit the ‘report’ button on a load of memes. The results are below. Be forewarned: the results and the content I reported (particularly the content!) fail t...
Read more

Is Formula Feeding Worse Than Smoking?

Image
When you read the title you probably thought, ‘But formula is nothing like smoking, jeeeeez!’ On the contrary, there are numerous parallels. In this post I’m going to set out, not only why formula feeding is like smoking, but why it may even be considered  worse . Firstly, a common thread between formula feeding and smoking is consumption patterns. They both follow the addiction model: It’s easy to get hooked, and then you’ve gotta have it (see what I mean,  here ). During World War II, soldiers were issued with free cigarettes, courtesy of the tobacco companies, whereas today formula companies gatecrash maternity wards, doctors’ surgeries, and parenting magazines proselytizing with free formula: Health cover-up Mark my word friends, in the not so distant future, lawsuits will be filed against formula companies claiming that they are responsible for the ill-health of the obese, diabetics, crohn’s sufferers, allergy sufferers, arthritis sufferers and asthmatics, to name but a f...
Read more

The Eroticism of Child Birth

Image
It is late, later than usual. The lights are low and they are alone at last. Soft music is playing, with a familiar cadence. They have made love to this one before. A faint but primal scent is in the air. The origin is certain; the fragrance is an unmistakable blend of the two of them. Everything is perfect, the time is right; intimacy is at its peak. Their gaze is unbroken; their union is penetrating, physically and emotionally; a smouldering combination. It is as though they have waited for months for this very moment, the anticipation is vast. They move back and forth in unison. The energy is building, one can feel the pulsation. She is breathing heavier now; driven by her hormones she is moving to a familiar rhythm, he follows her lead. He caresses her, ever so gently, in all the right places, she lets him know just where. They have been here together before, but never like this. “Oh Yes! Yes please! Yes, thank you, darling. Oh right there, yes, oh baby. You are doing it just right...
Read more